Author: fananicfan
Subject: December 2008 Challenge Story, A continuation of Overcoming Obstacles

December 2008 Challenge Story


OVERCOMING OBSTACLES, PART 3

For Disclaimer: see the first part one of the story. Parts one and two are now listed on the October 2008 challenge story archive page.

AN: I threw in November 2008 challenge lines, too.

AN #2: This story starts with the last couple of lines exchanged between Harm and Mac at the end of the last part and moves forward from there.



OVERCOMING OBSTACLES, PART 3

MAC'S POV

"I think that my boyfriend should kiss me good night when he drops me off after we've had dinner, don't you?"

His jaw relaxes and the corners of his mouth turn up into a warm smile. "Absolutely," he says a fraction of a second before his lips touch mine.

The kiss is like our kiss under the mistletoe, coming up on three years ago now. We both knew that it was coming, but it was a little awkward, yet pleasant.

We've barely put space between our lips after the first kiss when his arms wrap around me and our lips meet again. The awkwardness is gone and the kiss is soft and tender.

The second kiss comes to a natural close, and he pulls back, loosening his hold on me as he does.

"Mac, I ... I'd like to kiss you all night, but ... " He stops speaking, and I don't know if he's trying to find the words or if he simply needs to take a breath after our kiss.

" ... But?"

I see sadness in his eyes as he finishes his thought. " ... but ... we've agreed that there are obstacles to overcome, hurt feelings to address ... I think we need to do that first ... " His body tenses, and his eyes look away from mine. " ... and I want you to have time to be sure that you're ready for "us". I don't want to be your rebound guy."

"I see," I say, stunned by his honesty, but the sense of hurt that I feel is the one that takes over my actions, causing me turn and pull from his loose embrace.

He catches my arm as I try to get away. "Do you? We've had misunderstandings before, so I want to be clear. I'm saying that, if you love or loved him ... it may be too soon for you to be involved with any one." He tugs at my hand and moves towards me until he can slip his arm around my waist. He looks me in the eye once more. "I don't want anything to ruin our chance of making "us" work. I want you to know that, if you need time ... I can wait. That's what I meant."

The sincerity in his eyes melts my anger, and I put my arms around his neck as our lips come together in a kiss of understanding and hope.

When the kiss ends, he pulls back and says, "I really need to go." The regret in his voice is evident to me. "Do you have any plans for tomorrow?" he asks as his arms drop back to his sides.

"No," I say softly.

"Then, why don't we go to a movie, take a walk, have lunch or dinner ... I don't know, something ... anything as long as we do it together."

"I'd like that," I say, trying to hide my disappointment that he's leaving now.

"I'll pick you up at noon. We can decide what we want to do over lunch." He waits until I give a nod of agreement before he places a kiss on my forehead and says, "Sweet dreams." Then he walks towards my door.

When he exits my apartment, I feel chilled, as if he's taken all the warmth in my apartment and in me with him.

NEXT DAY, SATURDAY
MAC'S APARTMENT
1030

MAC'S POV

I've started to call Harm on five different occasions to cancel our lunch, but I didn't want him to perceive it as some kind of rejection when the simple truth is that I'm tired. I didn't sleep a wink last night.

The events of earlier in the evening haunted me, and I found myself thinking about my relationship with Harm, Webb and just about everybody else that I know, as well as the events of the last year.

Harm is a rare breed, a truly noble gentleman and, last night, not taking advantage of the situation and my vulnerabilities only proved that to me once again.

I stand up, leaving my comfortable position on the sofa to go to my balcony doors to check the weather before I decide what I'll wear today.

I pull back the drapes and see that the sky is filled with dark clouds and that the day is gray and gloomy.

I should call Harm and tell him that it looks like we're in for a nasty storm and that we shouldn't go out today.

I go to the phone for the sixth time, but I don't pick it up because I know that Harm was right about us needing to talk. If he cancels, I'll see it as a sign that we were just never meant to be, but I won't be the one who backs away from what is probably our last chance.

I think jeans and a top would be fine for a day like today as I head off to my bedroom to change for my date ... my meeting ... lunch with Harm.

1115

I have forty-five minutes left before Harm is scheduled to arrive. I go to the balcony again to see if the clouds have moved on or not. I find that they haven't. In fact, it's begun to rain.

I decide to make us lunch so that, once Harm arrives, we won't have to go out in this awful weather.

1140

Though I'm low on supplies, I've managed to make us something edible for lunch. Since the search through my refrigerator and cupboards took twenty-five minutes, I decide that I should have another look outside to check the weather again.

The news isn't good. The flood gates have opened up and, along with the rain, there's thunder, lightening and high winds. It's no weather for anyone to be driving around in out there.

I go to the phone to call Harm. Perhaps I can catch him before he leaves his apartment. I don't want him out in this weather when he doesn't have to be. We can have lunch another day.

1147

HARM'S POV

I'm standing outside her apartment door, looking at my watch. I've been here for nearly ten minutes. I don't want to show up too early because it may make me look too eager to see her. On the other hand, with the rain coming down so heavily this morning, I didn't want to risk being late and appear disinterested. I need to proceed with caution. I can't be too eager, yet I can't give her the impression that I've lost interest.

It's true that she called me her boyfriend, but that was before I opened my big mouth, so I'm not sure what the status of our relationship is at this point. I thought that I was acting in our best interest at the moment, but, on my drive back to my apartment, it occurred to me that she might have seen it differently.

In the first place, my thinking that our kissing was going to lead to anything else could've made her see me as being egotistical or presumptuous.

Next, she could have seen my leaving, not as a noble deed, but as me saying that I didn't think that she possessed the strength or the will power to say no and stop things if she felt that things were happening too fast.

I spent most of the night thinking about what happened and how she may have seen the events differently. I spent what was left of the night thinking about what I should or could say to her this afternoon to make my reasons clear to her and how, in general, to communicate better with her.

Hopefully, she won't be so angry with me that she won't let me in the door. Since I got two hours of sleep tops, if I don't get to sit down soon, I'm going to fall down, so I decide to knock, hoping that she'll invite me inside.

I pose my hand to rap on the door when my cell phone rings. I reach in the pocket of my windbreaker and pull out my phone. I'll take this call before I knock, I think as I pull my phone from my pocket.

I look at the caller ID. It's Mac. I smile first, and then frown when the thought that she might be calling to cancel occurs to me.

"Hey, Mac," I say with as much cheeriness as I can muster, given my fatigue, because I want to give her the benefit of the doubt.

"Good, you're all right," she says, sounding genuinely relieved.

"Yeah, why wouldn't I be? You didn't have one of those visions of yours, did you?"

"No ... it's just the weather is so awful and to know that you were out driving in it ... " she says, sounding concerned for my well being.

"I'm fine. In fact, I'm here. I was just about to knock on your door when you called."

"You're here?" She sounds excited.

"Yes, right outside your front door."

I hear her footsteps and, a moment later, she opens the door.

"You look tired," she says as she flips her phone closed.

"So do you," I reply as I close my phone.

"You left me last night with a lot to think about ... I didn't get any sleep," she says wearily as she opens the door fully, allowing me to enter her apartment.

I step inside, shoving my cell phone back in my pocket as I move. "I did a lot of thinking last night, too."

"I made us lunch so we could eat here. It's only pasta salad, but I didn't have much to work with ... I need to do some shopping," she says, trying to sound chipper, but missing the mark.

"Sounds good," I reply with a sigh.

"Then, take off your jacket and we'll have lunch," she says, the enthusiasm in her voice a little more believable, but the voice doesn't match what I see in her eyes.

"Can it wait just a minute? I want to say something about last night."

"I'm not very hungry anyway, so go ahead. What's on your mind?"

"I just wanted to say that I didn't mean to imply ... what I mean is that, last night ... well, I was projecting what I was feeling onto you, assuming that you felt ... .well, let me just say that my leaving last night had nothing to do with you."

"Are you trying to apologize for kissing me? I sort of started that, so there's no need for you to apologize. Just forget it."

"I'm not sorry for kissing you," I say hurriedly. I don't know why I have so much trouble communicating with her. "Are you wishing we hadn't?"

"No."

"Then we're okay?" I ask hesitantly.

"As far as I know, yeah, we're fine. Are you ready for lunch?"

"Sure am," I reply gratefully.

"I've got a feeling that the weather is going to get worse before it gets better ... " she begins as she heads to the kitchen. " ... so do you want to watch a movie after lunch?"

What I really want to do is start talking, but we're both so tired that I don't know if it would be productive. Perhaps another time would be better for us to talk. "A movie sounds good. If the weather clears, I'll take you to dinner before I head home," I say to her back as she enters the kitchen.

AN HOUR LATER

MAC'S POV

I think that Harm is just about as tired as I am and, therefore, neither one of us could tell you a thing about the movie that we agreed to watch.

I do remember the weather alert interruption during the movie. The severe storms we're experiencing are the result of a hurricane that made land fall about fifty miles north of us. After telling us repeatedly that it was the first Atlantic storm to form into a hurricane in April, the meteorologist said that the conditions outside were going to continue to be severe through the evening and well into the night before the storm weakened. Airports were closed, and some highways and roads were closed due to falling trees or flooding, so it was recommended that everyone stay indoors.

I can't keep staring at the TV screen. I need to do something other than sit here. "Do you want some popcorn?" I ask, hoping that he'll say yes to give me a reason to get off this sofa and move around.

"No, I'm fine ... " He must see the disappointment on my face at his answer because he adds, " ... but don't let that stop you from making some for yourself."

"Would you like something to drink?" I ask hopefully.

"I'm not really into the movie either, Mac. We can change the channel or shut it off. It doesn't matter to me. I'm the guy with no TV, remember?"

How can the man know me well enough to know that I'm getting antsy sitting here, yet not know that I want him to take me in his arms and hold me? It's damned frustrating!

A bolt of lightening, so close that it lights up the darkened room, crackles and pops outside, stopping my thoughts. It's followed by a clap of thunder so strong that it shakes my apartment building, and then the room becomes quiet and much darker - the power has gone off.

"I wonder how long the power is going to be off," I say, trying to make conversation now that there's no TV for a distraction.

"In a storm like this, it'll probably be a while," he states with authority.

"Then I should get the flashlight and matches from the kitchen drawer. We can light some candles around the room before we lose what little illumination we're getting from the outside now." The skies are so dark outside that I hate to call it light, but it is keeping the room from being pitch black. I stand to go to the kitchen to retrieve the flashlight. "I'll be right back."

I know exactly where I keep the flashlight and matches, so it takes me all of two minutes to get from the sofa to the kitchen and back to the living room.

"I'll just light the pillar candle on the coffee table for now. We can light more candles as it gets darker in here."

I light the candle and sit back down on the couch where I was sitting before the lights went out.

"What should we do now?" he asks.

"I've got a few movies. I say we resume movie watching until the battery dies in my portable DVD player."

"Okay, a day at the movies will continue then."

I get up again and go to my bedroom to get the DVD player and the handful of movies that I own. I sit back down, placing the movies on the sofa between us and then lean forward to open up the DVD player.

"Do you want to pick a movie?" I ask.

"No, just start with the one on the top, and we'll work our way through the stack," he suggests.

"Okay," I respond with a shrug.

1610

HARM'S POV

Thank God I'd seen the first movie, so if she wants to talk about it at any point, she won't know that I spent most of the time watching her while it was playing.

With no power, she's let her guard down as if the darkness cloaks her secret, but, in her relaxed state, the candlelight sheds light on her features and gives her secret away. She isn't just tired. She's exhausted. Last night wasn't the first night that she hasn't slept, and her movement in trying to find a comfortable position every few minutes lets me know that her back is still bothering her. I wonder if the back pain is what's keeping her awake at night.

As the second movie begins, I see her yawn. A part of me thinks that I should leave so that she can get some sleep, but a larger part of me doesn't want to give up this time with her, so I turn my attention back to the small screen on the coffee table to watch the movie.

TWENTY MINUTES LATER

I've been doing pretty well with keeping my eyes on the movie and not on Mac, but a lull in the action on the screen has my eyes drifting to take another look at her.

Her head is on the arm of the couch, and I think she's asleep. She needs her rest, so I should go home, but I don't want to leave her in the slumped over position that she's in now.

I stand and kneel down to put her legs up on the couch.

After getting her stretched out on the couch, I think better of leaving her there with her back bothering her, so I get into a position that will allow me to scoop her up without hurting my back and lift her from the couch. I'll put her in her bed and then I'll leave.

With her in my arms, I move slowly and carefully to her bedroom so that I don't take a misstep in the dark.

Once in her bedroom, I lay her down on her bed and return to the living room.

In the living room, I shut off the DVD player and pick up the flashlight so that I can take it in and put it on her night table in case she needs it if she wakes up and the power is still off. I'll blow out the candle just before I walk out the door.

I turn to go to the bedroom with the flashlight and find Mac standing a few feet in front of me. The noises from the storm outside must have masked any sound that she made walking into the room.

"Where are you going?" she asks, sounding almost panic-stricken.

"I was going to head back to my place." She gives me a look that asks 'why?' "You were sleeping and you need the rest," I explain.

"You can't leave in this weather," she says with a hint of fear in her voice.

"I'll be okay. I made it here, didn't I?" I say with a cocky grin.

"Why take chances that you don't have to? You told me that Mattie's in Blacksburg with her father, so there's no reason why you have to go, right?"

"No, but -" I begin, but she cuts me off.

There's a hitch in her breathing as she says, "Don't go." Then, to my surprise, her arms come around my neck, and she holds on tightly. "I don't know what I'd do if something happened to you," she whispers. The whisper is heavy with emotion, and her breath warms my neck.

I wrap my arms around her, taking her into a comforting embrace. "I won't go as long as you try to get some sleep." I feel her nod against my shoulder in agreement.

I don't want to let her go until she feels better, so I stand with her in our embrace for another minute until her arms slip down, releasing her hold on me. Then I reluctantly allow my arms to fall away from her waist and back to my sides.

"Why don't you go lie down? I'll finish watching the movie ... maybe sack out on the couch for a short nap. I'll leave when the storm eases."

"You won't leave without saying goodbye, will you?" she asks with the wide eyes of a child who's afraid of the raging storm outside.

"I'll let you know when I head out."

She looks like she wants to say something, but refrains, turns and walks towards her bedroom.

I wish I knew what was going on inside that pretty head of hers. If I did, I'd know better how to help her get through whatever it is that's bothering her.

NINETY MINUTES LATER

My eyes are closed, and I'm on the edge of sleep when odd noises reach my ears.

I'm still alert enough to know that I'm in Mac's apartment and that I was watching a movie. 'It must be something in the movie that I'm hearing,' I think as I ignore the sounds and try to make my way into sleep.

There are more of these strange sounds, and then, "No," a woman screams. The woman is Mac, and I go from being nearly asleep to fully awake and on my feet in a fraction of a second.

I take off for her bedroom and, when I get inside the door, I automatically reach for the light switch, but when I flick it to what should be the on position, nothing happens. I forgot that the power is off.

Thanks to the surgery that restored my night vision, when I look towards the bed in the dark, I can see that Mac is tossing and turning, not like she's trying to get comfortable, but more like she's in a struggle with someone or something.

"Mac," I call out, but get no answer.

I move closer to the bed. "Mac?" I still get no response.

I sit on the side of her bed and try a third time to wake her. "Mac!"

This time, my voice penetrates whatever she's been dreaming about and she starts to sit up. Her hair is a mess from the tossing, and the covers fall down to her waist as her torso becomes fully upright. It's then that I notice that she's changed into silk pajamas that I've seen her wear before.

"Harm, I'm glad that you're here," she says softly as she puts her arms around my neck for the second time tonight.

Unsure what she was dreaming about, though it's obvious that it wasn't a pleasant dream, I put my arms around her and hold her.

With the power off, there's a level of silence that doesn't usually exist, and I can hear her heart beating.

"Your heart is racing," I say, concerned.

"Nerves, I guess," she answers, holding on to me a little tighter.

"Tell me what you were dreaming about, Mac." I'm hoping that my plea will get her to open up to me.

I feel her take in a breath, but she doesn't exhale.

"Breathe for me. Take in a few deep breaths and then just tell me," I say, trying not to sound like I'm begging.

"I ... can't," she says sadly.

"Then tell me what I can do to help." I don't care if I sound like I'm begging now.

She pulls back enough to look me in the eye. "Don't give me something else to worry about. Stay here tonight ... with me."

My first thought is how much I'd love to stay the night with her - share her bed. However, my next thought is that the time isn't right. I'm lost in thoughts of how to turn her down without her taking it as rejection when her voice makes its way into my ears.

"It wouldn't be the first time that we've slept in the same bed," she says, pleading her case.

I wonder if she was able to read my thoughts. With the clarification of what she meant, I feel more at ease.

"If it'll make you feel better, I'll stay." If she wants me here, I don't want to be anywhere else.

She releases her hold on me. "Then get comfortable and climb in bed," she says nonchalantly, as if me spending the night is like having Chloe here with her.

I toe off my shoes first and then remove my shirt. I decide that it's as comfortable as I should get tonight. The memory of the way our kisses made me feel last night also makes me think that it would be best for me to sleep on top of the covers and let her sleep under them.

We lay in the dark for several minutes before she speaks my name.

"Harm?"

"Yeah?"

"How did you deal with what happened in Paraguay?"

So she's still feeling the effects of Paraguay. "I blamed Webb ... the admiral, just about everyone. I had to come to terms with the fact that my part in it was of my choosing and accept that I didn't handle the situation very well. It took me a while ... but I'm okay now. Although, I can't say that I don't have any regrets because I would do some things differently if I had them to do over again."

"You blamed me and were angry. That's the reason why you didn't return my calls, wasn't it?" she says, convinced that that's the reason.

"No, when it came to you, it had more to do with the fact I'd been the jealous jerk that you'd accused me of being. It hurt to hear your voice when I listened to your messages because I knew that I'd screwed up, and I couldn't imagine how much it would hurt to talk to you, so I didn't call."

"I didn't lie to you. There was nothing between Webb and me in Paraguay."

" ... It's just that the kiss was pretty intense. For everything that we've been through, you've never kissed me like that, so I got jealous."

"Everything that happened down there was intense, and just when I think that I've moved past it ... " Her words trail off and she takes in a deep breath. " ... the nightmares begin again."

"I'll listen if you want to talk about them," I say empathically.

"No, I don't want to talk about them ... " She pauses. " ... at least not tonight."

We lie there for a few minutes in silence, and then she asks, "Since I didn't kiss you, why didn't you kiss me?"

"I was going to, but then Webb and Gunny showed up, and Webb made some crack about the room being where you two spent your honeymoon, and I got jealous again."

"When you've been snarky with me over the last year, was it because you were still jealous?"

"Yes, I've learned that I don't handle jealousy well. It changes me into a big ass," I say with a sigh and a grin on my face.

"A handsome one though." This time, I can hear a smile in her voice.

"Well, thank you ... I think."

The room falls silent again for several minutes, and I lay there on my back, wondering if she's fallen asleep.

"I haven't been on my best behavior either," she admits with a great deal of sadness in her voice.

"We usually lean on each other. This time, we shut each other out, and that made it tough for both of us to deal with things and heal. You survived a lot of things at the hacienda before I got there. You're a strong woman to have returned with any of your sanity. It's natural that you wouldn't be able to address all the feelings that the experience invoked all at once, especially alone."

The room falls silent again. I don't know if my observation has wounded her Marine pride, if she's giving thought to my words or she's just trying to go to sleep. I want to ask, but the conversation has been flowing freely. I don't want to upset her. It might shut down our conversation. It might even lead to her shutting me out of her life completely, and that isn't a chance that I want to take now.

I don't have to wait long before she speaks again.

"Harm?"

"Yeah?"

"I want you to know that you're not the rebound guy. He was. You didn't return my calls." Her last sentence is laced with regret.

"I understand. He was there to make you smile or laugh, and he wasn't afraid to reach out and take your hand or tell you that he cared ... all the things that I should've done. I regret not being there to do those things." I move my arm over to the center of the bed and take her hand in mine. "I know that it may be too late, but I'm here now."

Silence fills the air, and it's quiet for a while before I hear her sniffle. She's been silently letting her tears flow, and that's why she's been quiet.

A couple of moments later, she breaks the silence with no trace of tears in her words. "Admiral Chegwidden ordered me to see a therapist. I've been thinking that I should go back to see her for a few more sessions to work through a few things."

"It couldn't hurt to have an objective third party with whom you can talk things through," I say in support of her decision.

"Will you wait for me to catch up to you?"

"As long as it takes," I say with sincerity that I hope that she hears.

I feel her body start to move and soon I feel her hand on my arm. She's rolled over onto her side and is using her other arm to prop up her head and shoulders. "Even though it might not be a good idea for us to be boyfriend and girlfriend right now, we don't have to go backwards either, do we?"

I raise an eyebrow to question her statement.

"I mean, we can still go to dinner sometimes, talk once in a while about something other than work ... that kind of thing, right?" she explains.

"Sure, I'd like that," I reply with the hint of a smile in my voice. I think we've made progress tonight.

"Me, too," she says before leaning forward and resting her head on my shoulder.

Without thought, I release her hand so that I can put my arm around her shoulders and, when I do, she relaxes against my side and puts the palm of her hand on my chest.

I place my hand over hers on my chest and I'm filled with contentment for what I have at this moment with her.

Between our talk and having her in my arms, I drift off into a peaceful sleep with a sense of hope that it isn't too late for us.



Should I put 'The End' on this part or finish writing Part 4?