This is in response to the HBX February 2006 fanfic challenge. I hope it's coherent, I'm writing it at night with a sleeping 4 year old in my lap.

It's set after Harm and Mac's marriage. They're in San Diego.

I don't own JAG, but if I did, I would have shown Harm and Mac together at home at least once, with a stuff Gorilla head on their wall.

I Forgot...
By TR
Rated Mild

Mac's hands shook as she attempted to slide the key in the lock. Her adrenalin was still on overdrive after the row she'd had with Harm. They'd had some doozies in the time they'd known each other, even in the time they'd been married but this one took the cake. Her jaw clenched. She never cared much for cake. Tears came to her eyes and she made no attempt to hold them back. She didn't care about holding back. She didn't care about how angry she'd been only 2 hours earlier when she'd left for work. She cared about nothing but seeing him.

An hour previous

Mac gave a heavy sigh. It was going to be one of those days. She'd known it from the first moment she'd gotten out of bed. Something was off. Even the coffee shop she'd stopped at every morning for the last 2 years had gotten her order wrong. Now she was sitting at work, angry with her husband, angry with herself, angry with the idiots who committed the crimes that spawned the files, that littered her desk. In her position she had staff to do the detail work, but that didn't make it anymore pleasant. She almost wished she was still a grunt in the thick of things. At least then she'd have something to distract her from the cast iron ball that sat in the pit of her stomach. She hated fighting with him. Hated it! Hated the idea that they were breakable.

She sat back in her seat and absentmindedly played with her wedding ring.

"You look like you need this today."

Mac looked up to see Jennifer Coates in the doorway of her office. She held a cup of hot coffee, and two extra strength headache pills. Mac recognized the recipe for impending disaster. She accepted the cup of coffee with a thankful nod. "Why exactly will I need those?" She said, pointing to the pills in Jen's hand.

Jen sat in the chair opposite Mac. "Because I got a call while you were in your morning meeting. Lt. Mitchell's fiance's remains were found buried two miles from their home."

"Hasn't she been missing for more than 5 years?"

Jen nodded. "And he's never gotten over it."
"I don't blame him. If someone I loved was just taken from my life without any explanation..." She trailed off and took a calming breath. "And I have to be the one to tell him."

"That's why you get paid the big bucks."

Mac nodded in resigned acceptance. "That is one of the draw backs."

"Do you want me to page him?"

"No. I'll go to him. I never liked being summoned to the principal's office, not for this kind of news."

Mac stood and headed toward the door. Stopping only to take the pills from Jen, and chase them with a mouthful of scalding coffee.

Lt. Mitchell stood as Mac entered his office. "Colonel Mackenzie, I've just finished my paperwork on the Wilson case..." He halted as Mac held up a hand.

"That's good, but that's not why I'm here Nick." She gestured for him to sit down.

"Nick? Last time you called me Nick you told me my brother had been in a car accident." For a moment he blanched. "Has something happened to him?"

"No, not that I know of. But you're right I don't come bearing good news."

He sat silently while she relayed the information. Noting the grip he had on the arms of his chair. Holding on to something concrete while the world dropped out from under him.

"Did she suffer?" He choked out.

"I don't know. They found her early this morning, there may not be enough time to know the details yet. You are welcome to use my office to make some phone calls if you'd like. It's a bit more private."

He stared down into his lap. "We fought that day. I don't even remember what it was about. Something stupid no doubt. She left, said she was going for a run to try to cool down so we could speak to each other 'like adults'. That was the last time I ever saw her. I didn't sleep for a week I swear. I could smell her on my sheets..." His voice was raw. "Oh my God!" He buried his face in his hands.

Mac's heart squeezed painfully, and her eyes stung with sympathetic tears.

He scrubbed his hands through his hair. "I would have given up anything to be with her. I've wanted to be a Marine since I was ten years old, but one look at her and I was willing to walk away from it, from anything, all she had to do was say the word."
Mac stared in surprise. Lt. Mitchell was a dedicated and skilled Marine. The Corp was his whole life. She couldn't imagine him being willing to give it up at such a young age. "Did you love her that much?" She found herself saying, before she could suppress it.

He didn't flinch. "I didn't realize how much until she was gone. That's always the way isn't it?" He shook his head, his voice dropping to a near whisper. "I didn't say I love you." He looked up and the devastation in his eyes sent a lump to Mac's throat. "When she didn't come home, all I thought was, 'I forgot to say I love you'. At first I thought she'd left me, but then..." He cleared his throat, and paused to regain his composure. "I'd like to request some leave."

"Already done."

He stood tall and straight, pulling himself together. "Thank you. I think I'll take you up on the use of your office Colonel."

She stood, and worked to keep her hands from shaking. "No problem, just let me gather a few things. I'm going to be out of the office for a while."

Present time

She found him where she'd left him, sitting by the window, looking out over the ocean. Only this time he had a guitar in his lap. She saw him tense as he detected her presence. "I'm not ready to talk to you yet Mac." His voice was tight.

"Then don't talk." She answered, fighting to keep her voice steady. "Stay where you are and just listen. Stay angry with me if you need to. But just stay." Her voice broke. "When I walked out the door this morning, I forgot to tell you I love you. I'm sorry. I love you Harm." Having spoken her piece, she turned and headed back out the door.

"Wait!" He was on his feet in a second flat.

She turned back toward him and had little time to react before he had his arms around her. She burrowed into the warmth of his body. "Something happened didn't it."

She nodded against his chest, her tears soaking through the cotton of his shirt to his skin. "They found Lt. Mitchell's fiancé'."

He sighed. "Dead?"

"Yes. Two miles from their house."

He shook his head. "That poor guy."

She raised her head and looked him in the eye. "Of course I had to tell him."
"That would fall to you wouldn't it."

"The last time he talked to her they were fighting, and he forgot..."

"...to say I love you."

She nodded, as her eyes welled up again. "I just don't know what I would do if the last thing I said to you was..."

"Shh." He moved his hands to her face, cupping her cheeks as his thumbs wiped her tears away. He kissed her slowly, tenderly. "I always know Mac. We're going to fight, that's what we do, but I'll always know you love me." He gave her a quick kiss on the bridge of her nose. "How could I not know."

She studied him for a long moment, then gave him a watery, thankful smile. "I know too."

He pulled her in, kissing her again. Heartily. "And don't you forget it."

"You make it hard to forget."

"Even when we fight?"

"Even when we fight."

She stepped back. "I have to get back to work." She said with disappointment.

He nodded. "And I'm still mad at you."

She smiled. "I know."

"But I'll be over it by dinner time, you want anything specific?"

She put a finger to her chin. "How about Pasta fagioli."

His eyes darkened. "That's not fair, you know what Italian food does to me."

She grinned. "I know." She stood on her tip toes and kissed his chin. "I really have to go." She looked him in the eye. "I love you."

"I love you too."

He watched as she walked out the door, then returned to his chair by the window, and picked up his guitar.