Author: Jaggie 107
Subject: What Should Have Been (HBX Challenge - July 2008)

Disclaimer : JAG characters belong to DPB, CBS and Paramount – and I hope all parties will allow me to have fun for a little while, and replace them all when I'm done. Thank you.

Summary : What should have been, when Harm found Webb on the beach. (H&F2/S10)

A/N: I know if I left things alone I’d get hit with an idea sooner or later – well, it’s ‘later’, but it’s still July!!!

Challenge lines :

Harm: Have you ever had your life turned upside down?
Mrs. Gale: Have you ever had your heart stop?

Back in the Saddle

WHAT SHOULD HAVE BEEN…

On the beach at Manderley

Harm came to a stop as he neared Webb, his gun held down in his hand, but Webb saw there was tension in the grip of Harm’s fingers.

“You look pretty healthy for a dead man,” Harm observed in a tense voice.

“Are you here to lecture me or shoot me?” Webb eyed the gun again before raising his eyes to meet Harm’s cold gaze.

“Have you ever had your world turned upside down, Webb?”

“Have you ever had your heart stop?” Webb countered, and Harm gave him a dirty look.

“Are you saying you have? You orchestrated each occasion when your heart ‘stopped’; when your friends believed you were dead and grieved for you. How could you do that to Mac? Especially now, when you’re in a relationship with her.”

“It was necessary, to fool Tanveer. It worked, too… he’s here, isn’t he?”

“You used her?” Harm glared at the man he had once thought of as a friend. “You’re a cold hearted bastard, Webb.” Harm’s gut roiled but he managed to quell the rising bile as he recalled Webb’s previous words. “What’s Tanveer got to do with this? He’s here to flush out the Hawk That’s who I thought you were until I realized it was you, sitting here like you have all the time in the wor…”

“I don’t have time to reminisce, Harm. Where is Tanveer?”

“He’s up at the house with...” Harm paused, and he thumbed the safety off his gun as he turned back to the house. “Oh hell, Webb! He’s the Hawk?”

“Yes, he is.” Webb answered as he got to his feet, taking the time to brush the sand off his clothes. Harm was already striding back up the beach to the house, weapon raised. “Harm, you can’t just go rushing in there!”

“I need to warn Mac…” Harm began, calling over his shoulder as he continued to make his way to the house.

“I won’t let you spoil this set-up, Harm. It’s taken too long…”

“Spoil your set-up?” Harm turned at that, stopping dead in the sand so fast that Webb almost ran into him. “You’ve spent all the time since Paraguay planning for another kill? Is that all this job is to you? I thought that was only in story books, Webb, or do you fancy yourself as the next James Bond? I hear they’re casting…” Harm sneered. “What are you going to tell Mac, huh?”

“Nothing. Need to know. Unless someone else tells her…” Webb studied Harm closely, wondering if that might be the case with the man in front of him. Harm was nothing if not innately honest. Webb knew Harm well, and that knowledge made him cautious. The sound of Harm’s voice drew him back to the conversation.

“Oh, don’t worry, someone will; but it won’t be me… you’re going to tell her…”

“And ruin a good thing? I don’t think so…” Webb began, but faltered at the look in Harm’s eyes.

“You’re going to tell her every sordid little detail, Clay; about how you used her in Arizona because of her relationship with Colonel O”Hara, and in Paraguay because you wanted her there – not because you loved her, but because you knew I did.”

“You missed your chance, Rabb. You let her go one too many times.”

“I may have messed up on a chance with Mac, and I may have used her, or at least her tactics in court. I never used her trust in me, and I never used her past against her.”

“Jeez, Rabb, you’re wasting your time. If Mac had any real feelings for you, don’t you think she would have at least told you by now?” Unknowingly, Webb’s words hit home, and Harm closed his eyes on a scene that played endlessly in his mind. Australia. A bridge. A ferry. And Mac…

“At least you won’t be wasting her time any more, Webb. I don’t how this is going to play out, with Tanveer, but I promise you – if you don’t tell her after, I will.”

Webb sighed, and followed a determined Harm up the beach to the main house. His disgust at himself for using the woman he professed to have loved, and his fear at her rejection once she knew the truth, were uppermost in his mind when he should have been concentrating on the Hawk… As he entered the doorway he found Mac kneeling on the floor, and Tanveer pointing a gun at her.

After, when Harm walks away from Mac

“Harm, wait!”

When Mac caught up to Harm she looked up into his face, his expression unreadable.

“I am ready…for you…for us…” Mac began, but halted as Harm brushed the pad of his thumb across her bottom lip.

“What about Webb?”

“It’s over, Harm. I…I told him, about knowing he used me. Not just this time, but in the past too. In Paraguay…and…even when you and I first met, he had me assigned to JAG because of my relationship with Uncle Matt. All this time…”

“It’s over, Mac,” Harm murmured, standing still, his arms by his side.

“I…I thought…we could…” Mac faltered, her eyes bright with unshed tears. With a shrug of her shoulders she began to turn away. Another chance, her last chance, lost. The light touch on her shoulder stopped her. The heat at her back told her Harm was right behind her. The voice in her ear told her how wrong she was. The arms that moved to turn her around, to hold her close, told her so much more. The hand that lifted her face to his brought a smile moments before his lips met hers.

From the deck of the house, two men watched the couple on the beach embrace; one turned away, one remained. As he saw Mac’s face lift to Harm’s descending mouth, Webb turned away too.

The End